Slap Me Across the Face and Call Me Beloved

Yet again my undergraduate alma mater, Indiana Wesleyan University, appears to have stepped in it — at least knee-deep this time.

An IWU student in his third year at the school said in an Instagram post Monday night that he was fired from his on-campus job as an assistant resident director because he is openly gay.

Zebulun Knuteson says he agreed to abstain from romantic relationships while working for the school and even agreed to refrain from speaking out against the theological stances taken by IWU and The Wesleyan Church. The conservative evangelical institution has clearly prohibited students from engaging in any sexual activity outside heterosexual marriage, after all. But his abstinence wasn’t enough.

Knuteson says he was booted from a student leadership position because his beliefs contradict Wesleyan teaching on sexuality.

“I am not upset that I was fired,” Knuteson wrote, “I am not upset that I was discriminated against for my sexuality, I am upset that a school that claims to uphold the teachings of Christ has been blatantly hypocritical […] They claimed it was because I couldn’t uphold their beliefs[,] but I challenge the administration to find one faculty member or student leader that fully believes and can uphold all elements of the Wesleyan doctrine.”

Knuteson, who served last year as a resident assistant, says he was transparent with IWU administrators about his sexual orientation before he was hired as an ARD. But, he says, that didn’t seem to matter to Mark DeMichael, who was named interim vice president of student development and athletics a few months ago after serving as IWU’s long-time athletic director. Knuteson says DeMichael is the one who fired him.

When I first saw my fellow IWU alumni sharing Knuteson’s story on social media, I paused. I have spoken out repeatedly against IWU’s policies with regard to sex and sexuality, arguing that they are willfully ambiguous and harmful to queer students. I have voiced my concerns both publicly and directly to IWU President David Wright, hoping that my story might help to spur some changes for the benefit of current and future LGBTQ+ students. Candidly, I’m tired. I haven’t seen much progress since I became a full-time IWU student in 2008, and I wasn’t sure my exasperated repetition would do any good this time around.

Then I saw the university’s response to Knuteson’s story, and I knew I needed to chime in again. The school continues to mistreat queer students while claiming to love everyone. 

In a statement released Tuesday, IWU Vice President of Regional Education & External Relations Carson Castleman seeks to portray IWU as a place that welcomes students who hold differing beliefs on a wide variety of topics, including students who identify with the LGBTQ+ community.

“Several fundamental values shape the Christ-centered IWU learning community into which we welcome our students,” Castleman says. “One of these is to love and respect all persons who come to study at IWU. The other is to do our best to lovingly and humbly bear witness to what we believe the Bible teaches about a godly life in such areas as sexual orientation.”

In other words, the university welcomes gay students but fully intends to drive home the message that gayness is bad. What remains unclear is whether IWU considers gayness to be so bad that it renders a student unqualified for a leadership role. Are students who self-identify as LGBTQ+ unqualified for leadership, even if they commit to celibacy? That’s the position Knuteson accuses DeMichael of taking on the university’s behalf. If that’s not the university’s position, then administrators should say so; if that is the university’s position, then administrators should say so just the same.

Castleton’s statement acknowledges that a student leader had “publicly disclosed details from a conversation with our student development staff,” but he claims federal student privacy laws prevent IWU from saying much more. “We regret the concern, anxiety, and confusion that this situation has created,” he says.

That’s not enough.

Current and prospective LGBTQ+ students need to know, with clarity, what standard their university will enforce. Are queer students full-fledged members of the IWU community, or are they subject to some sort of shadow probation? This isn’t an academic question and never was.

Students, faculty, staff and alumni should demand an answer — so I wrote a respectful email Tuesday evening to Castleman, DeMichael, and Wright, asking whether IWU’s policies prohibit student leaders from simply self-identifying as members of the LGBTQ+ community. (I will update this post if I receive a response.)

To be blunt, I have no faith that IWU will clarify its stance. I have watched for years as administrators have failed to wrestle adequately and honestly with these policies. They have resorted time and again to vague statements about purported institutional values rather than making any concrete commitments to queer students. The ambiguity is convenient, as it enables IWU to enforce its unspecified expectations capriciously while also mitigating scrutiny from both its conservative Christian constituency and the general public, which increasingly views IWU’s brand of homophobia as indefensible and socially inept.

I’m sure some will point to Castleton’s statement as noteworthy because it specifically mentions that LGBTQ+ students are, in fact, members of the IWU community — which, let’s be clear, is still a controversial position in some circles. That statement would have been deeply meaningful to me, as a gay alumnus, if it had come in a different context. But the university trotted out its supposed commitment to queer students in an effort to quell outrage over Knuteson’s firing.

Administrators haven’t claimed that Knuteson was never fired, nor have they publicly disavowed or overruled DeMichael’s decision. Furthermore, I am not aware of anyone alleging that Knuteson’s account is inaccurate. That leads me to believe that IWU really did revoke Knuteson’s job on the basis of his sexual orientation then release a statement claiming to love and support LGBTQ+ students.

What do the words “I love you” mean when they come from someone who just slapped you across the face?